No more theories

I've just discovered that no theories in the world can bring peace.. it's a moment to moment thing..much like faith or any other emotion where both will and feelings come into play. Odd how a million theories can't do the job of a small breeze blowing ripples on the water..

Finishing 'Captivating' by John and Stasi Elderedge. In it, the authors say that the essential question for men is 'Am I man enough? Can I succeed?' while the essential question for women is 'Am I lovely? Am I desirable?' Interesting. Apparently we spend our days asking that question to all around us, hoping to find acceptance. The authors contend that only God can answer the question satisfactorily, and only His answer counts. I agree in theory, and I keep wondering why I find it hard to accept at a gut level.

Did a super comprehensive survey today.. it asked questions like 'If you could change your job, would you? Would you have joined this profession if you knew then what you do now? How important is job stability to you? How important is not following regulations to you?'
Boy, talk about reflective.. it forced me to really think about what teaching still means to me. Whatever happened to mission work? Have i lost the passion? Or was it simply never there and only glamourised in my mind?

Maybe starting all over again from ground zero is a good thing.