Surprised by joy

"For the first time I examined myself with a seriously practical purpose. And there I found what appalled me; a zoo of lusts, a bedlam of ambitions, a nursery of fears, a harem of fondled hatreds. My name was legion.” ― C.S. Lewis, Surprised by Joy


I was surprised by joy on this cold, rainy day. Trudging to church and wondering if it would be worth it, I found myself humbled and touched by the message and the presence of God.


The sermon was on Mark 5, on Jesus' healing of a demon-possessed man - a surprising choice of passage in a rather conservative church. The speaker was Sandy Willson, from the World Relief Mission. But as he explained this story that I had heard so many times before, I caught a glimpse, an inkling of who Jesus is.


These past 9 months of being in Boston, of returning to church, of praying again - sporadically , in fits and starts and backward glances - it's been tied to this mystery - who is this Jesus? How is it that I was serving fervently in church for 9 years and I could only sing of Jesus, but when I prayed, it was to a God that seemed to be distant and removed from this Jesus fellow? Who was this Jesus that people could speak of so intimately, so lovingly?


And today - a glimpse.


So they arrived at the other side of the lake, in the region of the Gerasenes. Mark 5:1

The other side of the lake, Gerasenes, a mean place, filled with Gentile evil that would have petrified the disciples.

There is no place that Jesus will not go to.


2 When Jesus climbed out of the boat, a man possessed by an evil[b] spirit came out from a cemetery to meet him. 3 This man lived among the burial caves and could no longer be restrained, even with a chain.


A lunatic, a violent man. Of all the people that Jesus could have made the journey for, it was this man.

There is no person that Jesus will not save.



8 For Jesus had already said to the spirit, “Come out of the man, you evil spirit.”9 Then Jesus demanded, “What is your name?” And he replied, “My name is Legion, because there are many of us inside this man.” 10 Then the evil spirits begged him again and again not to send them to some distant place.


Legion. There is no end to my sin or flaws or fears or doubts.

There is no power that Jesus cannot overcome.



18 As Jesus was getting into the boat, the man who had been demon possessed begged to go with him. 19 But Jesus said, “No, go home to your family, and tell them everything the Lord has done for you and how merciful he has been.”


There is nothing to speak of but the Lord's mercy. There is no greater wisdom, no greater argument, no clearer truth.

There is no one Jesus cannot use.



A glimpse, and I am in awe.